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God Puts The Squeeze On Richard Roberts

I just love watching “fundies” use god to explain and justify their every action…wheth er it be good or bad. For those who haven’t heard, Richard Roberts, the son of Oral Roberts, now reports that he resigned his position as President of Oral Roberts University because god told him he must (on Thanksgiving Day no less).

Apparently god wasn’t speaking loud enough or Roberts was ignoring him while he and his family were milking the University to enable their lavish life of excess…or perhaps god was simply too busy at the time to tell him to stop. And by all means we can’t have expected Roberts to do the right thing of his own accord. How would a man of god know the difference between right and wrong without proper consultation from the heavenly father? It just goes to show that heaven is understaffed and it’s leading to all sorts of improprietie s and numerous lost souls here on earth.

Richard Roberts told students at Oral Roberts University Wednesday that he did not want to resign as president of the scandal-plag ued evangelical school, but he did so because God insisted.

Roberts told students in the university’s chapel that God told him on Thanksgiving that he should resign the next day.

Roberts said he resisted the idea, and that “every ounce of my flesh said ‘no,’” but he prayed over the decision with his wife, Lindsay Roberts, and his father, Oral Roberts, and decided to step down.

Roberts has previously said that God told him to deny the allegations. The week the lawsuit was filed, Richard Roberts said that God told: “We live in a litigious society. Anyone can get mad and file a lawsuit against another person whether they have a legitimate case or not. This lawsuit … is about intimidation  , blackmail and extortion.”

Apparently god is one savvy attorney as well as an omniscient and all knowing creator. Given sufficient time to review the case against Roberts, god apparently decided Roberts lacked a plausible defense. I can’t wait for god to impose a dollar amount to settle the lawsuit…and if past experience holds true, I’m sure god will insist Roberts deliver one of those tearful tell all confessions.

You see, without the oft seen mea culpa, how would Roberts be able to continue to live off of the donations of those who place far too much faith in mere mortals…mani pulative mortals who have learned that one can do anything one wants as long as one attributes it to god’s will?

Did I mention I’m in training to be a minister? And by the way, don’t blame me, it was god’s idea.

Cross-posted at Thought Theater


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3 Responses to “God Puts The Squeeze On Richard Roberts”

  1. I’m a former student of ORU.

    This is so true. I saw the improprietie s at the school when Oral was still at the helm in ‘90 - ‘92. It’s sad that it has taken 15 years for the truth to come out. Things have only gotten worse since Richard took over.

    Your second paragraph makes a good point. Was God too busy or not talking loud enough? Or was it that Richard wasn’t listening? Hmmm….

    The sad thing is, you are right again in your first paragraph. According to Richard, in October, God told him to deny the aligations. Now, in November, God is telling him that he needs to resign. I’m confused!!! It sound to me like Richard is attempting to blame God for the flip-flop in policy standing. Hmmm….

    Or is it that he got caugh trying to “cook-the-bo oks” after and audit was called? Hmmm………

  2. As Richard Carlin noted, God is the creator of the universe, all knowing, all powerful… and He needs money. Good at everything else, but just can’t handle money. What’s going on with that?

    I vaguely recall something about fiscal matters falling under the heading of rendering unto Caesar rather than unto God, but perhaps He’s diversified since after noticing what a sweet deal contracting government functions is these days. Of course, that would make God a Republican, a thought more likely to trigger wholesale conversions to atheism than anything else I can think of.

  3. Oral would be proud that his son carries on the family tradition of religious idiocy and madness. Why on earth any parent would send their child to ORU after the similarly scandalled-1 980s is beyond me. But, then again, they’re fundamentali sts. So, I guess that makes them pretty stupid to begin with.

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